_{Benoit Malige}

I spend a lot of time in my head.

Probably more than I should.

And over the years, I've noticed something—something I can't quite put into words.

I've tried explaining it to people. Every time, it feels like I'm grasping at something just out of reach. The more I try to describe it, the harder it becomes to find the right words.

It's like trying to explain a mushroom trip to someone who's never felt that "oneness."

So, when I close my eyes and let my mind drift...

It’s not like reliving a memory, where I see or smell the past. It’s more like a shift—a change in the vibrations inside me, as if I'm tuning into a different frequency.

And suddenly, I’m not here anymore. I’m somewhere else. Somewhere from my past.

I can't see it. I can't describe it in detail. But I can feel it—every emotion, every essence of the moment. It feels more real than real, like a life turned up to full volume—vivid and raw, making the present seem muted in comparison.

It only lasts a few minutes—maybe 2 or 3—but in that short time, my body feels like it's traveling to 8 or 10 different places, each one as real as the next.

It's as if the fabric of time loosens, and I'm slipping between different layers of reality, held together only by the emotions I once felt.

I’m not sure if that makes me crazy, or if anyone else can relate. (If so, please let me know—I’d feel a lot better.)

But it makes me wonder... if emotions can pull me into these alternate realities so effortlessly, what else are they shaping in my life? Or in yours?

I mean, if a feeling can change how I experience a single moment, maybe our emotions are shaping how we see everything, you know?

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How emotions create reality

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I’ve been thinking a lot about how our emotions shape the world we see.

I know that sounds abstract, but think about it…

A single feeling can change everything.

• When you’re stressed, your entire day feels heavier. Conversations feel more intense, even the colors around you seem muted.
• And when you’re in love, suddenly it’s like someone turned up the brightness on your life. The world feels lighter, like it’s wrapped in a soft glow.

We talk about emotions like they’re fleeting, passing things. But are they really? Or are they doing something far deeper?

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The Night I Changed the Wind

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This thought first hit me in Corsica, back in 2005. I was sitting on the beach with a friend at night, and the wind was cold—so cold that I couldn’t focus on anything else. It was all I could feel.

I wanted to change it. I wanted to see if I could alter how my body experienced that wind.

So, I tried.

I sat there, focusing, almost tuning into a different frequency. And suddenly, the wind didn’t feel cold anymore—it felt warm. I couldn’t believe it. How could a sensation change so quickly?

But here's the catch: the person sitting next to me? Still freezing their butt off. To them, nothing had changed—it was the same cold wind.

I was shocked. Like, how could my reality shift so drastically while theirs stayed the same? It got me thinking about how subjective our experiences really are.

That moment has never left me.

Two people, side by side, living the same moment, and yet our realities couldn’t have been more different. It made me question everything—what is reality, really? Is it the external circumstances around us, or is it something we feel and experience within?

And how much of our "reality" is actually shaped by what we believe and feel?

In a way, emotions are like hidden architects, designing the reality we live in. Every emotion lays a different brick, builds a new room, or paints a different color on the walls of our day-to-day experience.

And most of the time, we don’t even notice it happening.

It’s easy to think of our personalities as just "who we are." But if emotions are powerful enough to shape our reality, then maybe they’re also powerful enough to shape us.

And that leads to an even bigger question...

If emotions can shape what we feel and see, then maybe a lot of what we call 'personality' is just a collection of emotions we've held onto long enough that they've become part of us.

Maybe emotions have been shaping who we are all along, creating 'characters' within us that we haven't even met yet. Could that be how our personalities are formed?

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How Emotions Sculpt Our Personalities

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We tend to see our personality as fixed—something we're either born with or develop over time.

But personality is actually a living, breathing construction shaped by one thing: your emotions. Every emotion leaves a mark.

When you feel something often enough, it doesn’t just come and go—it becomes who you are.

Think about it. Someone who lives in a constant state of anxiety isn’t just feeling anxious from time to time—they become a “worrier.” And someone who consistently experiences joy or excitement becomes the “optimist.” These emotional states solidify into traits, defining how you show up in the world.

And it’s not just one set of traits.

Most of us have multiple characters inside us—each one built from the dominant emotions of different times in our lives. You might be confident and outgoing one day, and then deeply introspective the next.

These aren’t just shifts in mood—they’re different versions of you stepping forward, each one fueled by its own set of emotions.

I've seen it happen in my own life. There are times I’m assertive, ready to take on anything. And then there are days when I withdraw, becoming reflective and almost quiet.

It’s not just a change in feeling; it's a change in who I am at that moment. And these shifts aren’t random—they’re driven by the emotions that are most present in my life.

If emotions are the building blocks of personality, then who you are is more fluid than you might think—a collection of characters shaped by your emotions.

And here’s what that means—you have the power to decide who you become.

By choosing which emotions to hold onto and which to let go of, you can literally shape your personality. Engineer it, even.

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The Case of Billy Milligan

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If you’ve never heard of Billy Milligan, let me introduce you to one of the most intriguing cases of multiple personalities in history. You might be familiar with the movie Split, which is loosely based on his life.

But if you want the real story, I’d recommend reading The Minds of Billy Milligan. Trust me, it’s a deep dive into the complexities of his mind.

Billy wasn’t just one person. He was 24.

In the late 1970s, after being arrested for a series of crimes, investigators discovered Billy had Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), with 24 distinct personalities—each with its own name, age, emotions, and even physical traits.

What’s fascinating is that these personalities didn’t just differ in their thoughts and emotions—they manifested physically.

There was Arthur, a 22-year-old British intellectual who acted rationally and calmly. Then there was Ragen, a Serbian "protector" who displayed immense strength and aggression.

Ragen wasn't just "mentally" strong; he was physically stronger than the other personalities, as if his emotional state literally altered Billy's body.

It wasn’t just an act. When Ragen came forward, Billy’s strength truly increased.

Imagine that—a personality with emotions so strong, they actually changed the physical limits of the body. It’s like the mind had the power to change what the body was capable of, depending on which "character" was in control.

Now, Billy Milligan's story is admittedly an extreme case, but it highlights something intriguing: your emotions don't just hang out quietly in your head—they manifest in the real world.

While you probably don't have 24 personalities waiting in the wings, the emotions you entertain can change more than just your mood. They can influence who you are and what you're capable of.

Think of it as your emotions being the directors, and you're the actor ready to take on new roles.

They translate into the physical world, affecting not only our mindset and behavior but our physical abilities as well.

The thing is, Billy didn’t have a choice—his emotions split into different characters whether he wanted them to or not.

But you?

You actually get to decide which emotions come to the forefront. And when you do that, you’re not just shaping your mind. You’re shaping:

• your body
• your actions
• your whole existence.

You have the power to pick and choose which “characters” you want to bring to life.

So maybe the 'characters' we think are just moods or phases are actually more powerful than we realize. And if that's the case, it's worth thinking about what kind of character we want to bring to life next.

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Engineering Your Existence

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Remember that emotional time travel I talked about at the start?

That’s just one example of how emotions have the power to shape our experience. They don’t just pass through us—they build realities. And with the right awareness and practice, you can become the architect of those realities.

Think about it:

Your emotions are the architects of your life. They lay the foundation for the reality you build and the roles you step into.

Ever heard of neuroplasticity? It's your brain's way of saying, 'I can change if I want to.'

When you consistently feel certain emotions, you're essentially training your brain to adopt that state as the new normal. It's like programming your own operating system—but with feelings.

Take Arnold Schwarzenegger, for example (he came to mind because I’m currently reading his “Be Useful” book). Before he was the Terminator or the Governor of California, he was an Austrian kid with a heavy accent and dreams bigger than his biceps.

Get this—he didn't just think positively; he embodied his future success.

Every day, he felt what it would be like to be a champion, to stand on stage, to hear the applause. It's as if he sent a memo to the universe saying, 'I'll be over here acting like a winner until reality catches up.'

And eventually, it did. Reality had no choice but to catch up.

You might find this interesting too: Dr. Joe Dispenza, a neuroscientist and author, suggests that emotions don't just come and go—they actually transform you.

According to his research, when you habitually experience certain emotions, you're reinforcing specific neural pathways in your brain. Over time, this makes those emotional states your default setting.

So, if you're perpetually stressed, your brain becomes a master at stress—not exactly an Olympic sport you'd want to excel in.

And Billy Milligan? He’s an extreme case, but a reminder of how emotions can create different versions of you. Different personalities, physical traits, behaviors—all shaped by the dominant emotions at play.

But here’s the key difference: you get to choose which characters you bring to life.

So how do you do that?

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Putting It into Practice: Engineer Your Existence

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• Step 1: Identify Your Emotions
  Spend a few minutes each day reflecting on the emotions you're living in. Are they the ones that align with the life and person you want to become?

Are you living in stress, fear, or doubt? Or are you practicing confidence, joy, and curiosity?

• Step 2: Visualize & Feel
  Once you know the emotions you want, visualize the version of yourself who embodies those emotions. Don’t just think about it—feel it. Step into that character as if it’s already who you are.

Imagine you're about to take on a challenge. What would it feel like if you were already confident? How would you walk, talk, breathe?

• Step 3: Practice Daily
  Emotions are habits. The more you step into the feelings you want, the more those emotions will carve out pathways in your brain, shifting how you see yourself and the world.

Think of it like building a muscle—the more you train, the stronger it gets. And soon enough, you’ll find that new character coming to life naturally.

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Closing Thoughts

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So maybe the next time you find yourself feeling stuck—lost in a character you don’t want to play—remember that it's just one chapter in a bigger story. The power of your emotions, the ability to shape your characters, it’s all in your hands.

And the beauty of it is, you can choose to rewrite the story at any time.

Because personalities can feel like concrete walls—fixed, unchangeable. We go through life thinking, “This is who I am,” and live as if our characters are carved in stone.

But they’re not.

Every personality, every character you’ve ever been, is a story. A collection of emotions, thoughts, and beliefs that were repeated enough times to feel like the truth.

But stories can be rewritten.

Who you think you are today is just one draft of a much bigger script.

Think about the "you" from five years ago. Maybe that version of you would never have taken the risks you take today. Or maybe that character played small, worried what others would think, kept quiet when they wanted to speak up. But here you are, an entirely different version, because along the way, your story evolved.

And that means you have a choice—a choice to stop letting old emotions write your story for you. A choice to bring a new character to life, to step into a different reality.

What if the person you thought you were was just a starting point?

What if you let go of the characters that don’t serve you anymore? And gave yourself permission to feel something new—to be something more.

Because the truth is, you’re never done becoming. The characters within you are infinite.

And once you realize that, you can create any story you want.

So which story will you choose next?

Until next time,

Benoit

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